As I type this I'm getting ready for a date with a law student I've organised through the wondrous world of online dating. I have a picture of her, a phone number and a meeting place! I wanted to put a post up for men who have read my last few posts and are wondering what I mean by High Value Male....
This is a very important attribute you need to project when you attract any women. If you don't view yourself as high value then how is she going to view you?
What we are taught to do as men is impress women. thats how we get them - we impress them. We are taught to buy them things and we are taught to impress them by "showing off" and because of this we give women all the power in social situations. Enter the high value male. The high value male knows what he is worth to the world, his friends, his family and other women. He knows that he doesn't have to show off or prove his worth to anyone because he is already high value. If you can convey this then women will be lining up at your door because you are different from the other "try to impress me" men.
So, what are the characteristics of a high value male then? How do we convey this? through some very simple methods....
1) Make statements and do not ask questions about her. By making statements you are giving your opinion. Whether this is right or wrong it really doesn't matter. You are high value and you are demonstrating you are by showing your opinion. This DOES NOT mean you have to be loud, aggressive or forthright. You just need to show you have an opinion and the best way is statements
2) Every room he walks into is HIS. He is comfortable with all the people and the environment he is in. He isn't afraid to talk to people and give his worldly opinion
3) He builds up Rapport (very important this) by empathising with the woman he is talking to NOT by agreeing with everything she says. A common misconception amongst us men is that we need to agree with women and they will like us more. If you agree then agree, if you don't then don't agree. Simple. You don't need to shout, argue or debate you just give your reasons as to why you don't agree. As a high value male when you empathise with a woman - you are putting yourself in her shoes, imagining what it is like to be her. She will really appreciate this and you will be different from most "yes men" she has met, instantly. It is logical to assume that if you want someone to like you more then you agree with them. That makes sense. Attraction isn't logical though. Women are emotional creatures and don't go with logic when they are being attracted so empathise. More after the date later guys...please sign-up, follow and comment. Cupid
Wednesday, 28 October 2009
26th October - 3 NUMBERS AND WALL HUMPING IN ONE NIGHT
As I write this it is Tuesday and I am feeling rough after what was a fantastic night last night. Before we get into that I made a cold approach today - I was quite proud of myself. I call a "cold approach" and approach which is not part of any social situation. It is literally you walking up to a girl and starting a conversation where no socialness exists. Its very difficult and can feel awkward because of everything we have been taught about being sociable. We are taught not to talk to people and to view people who talk to us as "weird and lonely" - a sad world really at times isn't it? I didn't number close on my cold approach but I did have some lemon biscuits that she had with her and we had a laugh for ten minutes. The best way to cold approach is a situational opener. Tip: Just ask her opinion on anything in the environment you're in and if you can make a joke about it then do. You then move onto her and ask why shes here, guess where shes going, make an assumption about her personality based on how she looks and once you've done that shes interested and all of a sudden its a social situation and you get offered lemon biscuits. In this interaction she also dropped in that she had a boyfriend which is why I didn't go for the number close - hey - some girls are just off limits based upon where they are up to in their life and we just have to accept that! On to the night out now.........
Bar Number one I noticed two attractive girls - they passed my "man-scale" sitting on a table that was meant for four people so me and my friend sat next to them and continued our conversation and cauht up with each other, when he went to the bar and the ladies were continuing their conversation I joined in - this is very easy to do because they are already on a certain topic. They were talking about their jobs and how they don't like them. I started with "You look like fashion designer" because I knew this would intrique them because its a bold statement to make, most men would join conversations with a pick-up line or ask them a question. Tip: Join conversations by making statements about them. She asked me why I thought that, I said i could tell by her clothes that she had an individual style and I could imagine her making unique kooky clothes. Thats the hard part over, I'm now part of their conversation and they want my opinion. As a general rule, whenever a woman asks you a question about yourself it means that she is interested in you. Guys miss this. You should feel more confident everytime that she asks you a question because she is showing interest every step of the way. My friend got back to the table and I introduced him, this mwant I got their names without asking for it and it felt natural. The girl I was interested in was called Holly so I told stories whenever she asked me a question, made them laugh and poked fun at myself, the bar and my friend. Women love a guy who can make them laugh and I got her phone number. So it was a successful bar number one.
In bar number two I spotted two girls sat outside and I invited myself over to their table. Again, women love men who are confident so 9 times out of ten they will WANT you there if you go over with confidence. We sat there with them for about half an hour and I got another phone number. I didn't really feel connected to this one though and he called me cocky and said I was full of myself (I was a bit drunk and on a high at this point) but still gave me her phone number. This has led me to believe that when a woman calls you cocky and full of yourself it means that she finds you attractive!! Interesting food for thought.
We walked along the main street and spotted two girls sat outside a bar. I started an interaction with them based on how they looked and their body language. Dynamite this if its done well and then we sat with them and I asked one of the girls to go to the bar and get me and my friend a drink and she did. This shows the power of leading and what women will do when you are high value and confident. This is when I met Sarah. She was a pretty Jamaican girl who was 30 and passed my man scale. I made her laugh, my friend paired off with her friend and she invited me back to hers for a spot of giraffe preening...tee hee hee....When I woke up, we had breakfast and I had to go to work. She said she had never done this before and I believed her. She was sweet and a really good laugh so I think I'll see her again. What I learned today was that attraction is a STATE OF MIND. If you feel completely attractive then you will be to just about everyone. More when I have a next date. Please comment / ask questions and I'll answer....
Bar Number one I noticed two attractive girls - they passed my "man-scale" sitting on a table that was meant for four people so me and my friend sat next to them and continued our conversation and cauht up with each other, when he went to the bar and the ladies were continuing their conversation I joined in - this is very easy to do because they are already on a certain topic. They were talking about their jobs and how they don't like them. I started with "You look like fashion designer" because I knew this would intrique them because its a bold statement to make, most men would join conversations with a pick-up line or ask them a question. Tip: Join conversations by making statements about them. She asked me why I thought that, I said i could tell by her clothes that she had an individual style and I could imagine her making unique kooky clothes. Thats the hard part over, I'm now part of their conversation and they want my opinion. As a general rule, whenever a woman asks you a question about yourself it means that she is interested in you. Guys miss this. You should feel more confident everytime that she asks you a question because she is showing interest every step of the way. My friend got back to the table and I introduced him, this mwant I got their names without asking for it and it felt natural. The girl I was interested in was called Holly so I told stories whenever she asked me a question, made them laugh and poked fun at myself, the bar and my friend. Women love a guy who can make them laugh and I got her phone number. So it was a successful bar number one.
In bar number two I spotted two girls sat outside and I invited myself over to their table. Again, women love men who are confident so 9 times out of ten they will WANT you there if you go over with confidence. We sat there with them for about half an hour and I got another phone number. I didn't really feel connected to this one though and he called me cocky and said I was full of myself (I was a bit drunk and on a high at this point) but still gave me her phone number. This has led me to believe that when a woman calls you cocky and full of yourself it means that she finds you attractive!! Interesting food for thought.
We walked along the main street and spotted two girls sat outside a bar. I started an interaction with them based on how they looked and their body language. Dynamite this if its done well and then we sat with them and I asked one of the girls to go to the bar and get me and my friend a drink and she did. This shows the power of leading and what women will do when you are high value and confident. This is when I met Sarah. She was a pretty Jamaican girl who was 30 and passed my man scale. I made her laugh, my friend paired off with her friend and she invited me back to hers for a spot of giraffe preening...tee hee hee....When I woke up, we had breakfast and I had to go to work. She said she had never done this before and I believed her. She was sweet and a really good laugh so I think I'll see her again. What I learned today was that attraction is a STATE OF MIND. If you feel completely attractive then you will be to just about everyone. More when I have a next date. Please comment / ask questions and I'll answer....
25th October - SUNDAY BLOODY SUNDAY!!
Today I was absolutely cream crackered, knackered, very tired, sleepy because of last night - but I already had a date organised with a nice barmaid called Lisa who was 21 and from what I can remember, very pretty, so I pulled myself together but I don't think I performed amazingly well on the date because of my sleep deprivation!! She was lovely - a shy girl with a big, hidden personality. You have to be careful how you proceed with shy women because if you ask too many questions they view this as prying. What I do is ask them something about themselves and when they give me a bit of information about them I link it to a previous experience that I have had. I tend to go on a bit but they feel much more comfortable with that and I let them do the question leading and prying into my life. We went to two bars and we agreed to see each other again. Barmaid Tip: Barmaids, like strippers get hit on by men all the time so you need to stand out in order to get a barmaids phone number. You need to think completely outside the box here. How I got Lisas number was I accused her of poisoning the drinks, asked her if she had ever poisoned anyone before and complained that there was loads of dirty glasses at the bar and this was a health and safety issue and asked where I could raise a complaint, then asked her for her phone number so I could take her out and teach her the basics of health and safety and customer service. I did this is a fun, jokey manner and it worked. So with barmaids, be creative - you can get there phone numbers, you just need to be the exception again. he admitted to me on our date that she had never been accused of posioning drinks before and this made her laugh. I gave her a kiss on the cheek as I walked her to her bus and I was happy with that after last night. I didn't learn anything much today apart from the bits explained in the book THE GAME seem to work much better on younger women than they do on women my age. Tomorrow I am out with a mate and have no dates organised! Its make my own fate out there.........see how it goes.
24th October - WHAT A DAY!!!!
My good god up above. What a weird and wonderful day I have had! So i got up and went on date number one which I had already pre-organised prior to writing this blog. The date was with a girl called Elisha who I met in a stripclub. She was one of the strippers and I managed to get her real name, phone number and arranged to meet her today for a coffee in town. I know alot of men are going to be thinking - how did I do this at this point so in the interests of caring and sharing there is one Tip here...I think I'm going to start embedding tips in my posts so its easy to digest for everyone....OK so Stripper Tip: Simply, be the exception.
In order to attract women who strip, you need to firstly, imagine what its like to be them and think about how men interact with them. If you or me were a stripper then our opinion of men would be low because we dance for them. Night after night drunken men on stag parties / lads nights out would stagger in and throw their money at us for us to take our clothes off. What YOU have to do if you want to attract these types of women is do the OPPOSITE of what men in this situation would normally do. I got Elishas number by quickly building up Rapport with her and just being a normal guy. When she asked if I wanted a dance, I said NO. hen she said she wanted a drink, I said that i hoped she had enough money to buy her own (because she will be use to men buying her drinks) I then negged her (look up neg on Wikipedia) and demonstrated that I was a high value male and this led to me getting her number and meeting her for a coffee. (More on High Value Male later....very important but I'm too tired to go into it right now)
So, we went for a coffee and we chatted about HER. Tip One: Always talk about her
You don't give information away freely about yourself until she asks you because you are a high value male. You don't need to impress any woman, she needs to impress you. This really is a state of mind, but an easy way to start being high value is keeping everything about her until she makes the effort to ask about you. Imagine what its like being her, if shes telling a story imagine how she is feeling and wherever possible make her laugh.
We went on from our coffee into a bar and she bought us drinks. Again, she needs to pull her weight with me. She kept on jabbing me when I poked fun at her and by the end of the date I was hand in hand with her, walking her to her stripclub and she gave me a kiss before she went. Not bad for the first day in my social experiment, we arranged to meet up in the future. I then went back home and checked my online dating profiles and found I had a message....ooooo.....interesting. The message was from a girl called Steph. I emailed her back and she replied pretty much straight away. She was bloschy and very direct with her questions so i could tell that she thought alot of herself. I responded by being just as direct to her questions. Her questions were like: Where would you most like to go in the world? What do you do for a living? Where do you go out? She was eager, so I suggested that we meet up now so we can discuss these questions. After a ten minute MSN conversation - she suggested that we MSNed - I was heading out to meet her - very random. I joked with her and told her to wear a tight top and short skirt so Id know who she was - and she did. Only a high value male would act like this. Its screaming that she needs to justify herself to me and not the other way around. So we met in a pub....this leads me on to a very very very important next tip. Tip Two: Lead Whether its which venue you are going to, what time you meet, where you are going to sit - you LEAD. You don't ask for her permission or approval you just lead and do it. Women love this because it shows your sure of yourself and confident. I love this because its so simple and doesn't take any effort at all. I answered all of her quick fire questions calmly, slowly and confidently. This is important because whenever a girl is asking you questions like this she is challenging you. She is testing to see if you are good enough and can handle her. if you let nothing phase you and answer calmly and confidently and even better...slowly...you scream confidence without appearing arrogant or cocky. You will always pass the test. I find that men worry about what they say - care less about the content and focus on how you put it across because it will work wonders. After a really nice night and good conversation, she drove us back to hers and we bedroom hockeyed. (I am going to find adventurous ways to describe sex in this blog I think) I liked Steph, she was confident, pretty and a 34C. She also showed me messages from other men she had received from her dating website and it inspired me to really continue with this blog, because some of these men had absolutely no clue on how to handle or interact with women. one guy had put "I think I can fulfil the vacancy" - its not a job interview, its a date. that is one of the worst messages i have ever read. I encouraged her to go out on more dates but not expect too much because she had already had the best one!! Cheeky, confident humour - always goes down well. So, my first day of my social experiment. Two dates and some bedroom Violin playing. Not bad at all. The one thing I learnt today is that its important to be yourself and be completely at ease in your environment. Whether thats a coffee shop, bar or someone elses bedroom. If you act completely comfortable in your surroundings you are at your most attractive.....more tomorrow guys.
In order to attract women who strip, you need to firstly, imagine what its like to be them and think about how men interact with them. If you or me were a stripper then our opinion of men would be low because we dance for them. Night after night drunken men on stag parties / lads nights out would stagger in and throw their money at us for us to take our clothes off. What YOU have to do if you want to attract these types of women is do the OPPOSITE of what men in this situation would normally do. I got Elishas number by quickly building up Rapport with her and just being a normal guy. When she asked if I wanted a dance, I said NO. hen she said she wanted a drink, I said that i hoped she had enough money to buy her own (because she will be use to men buying her drinks) I then negged her (look up neg on Wikipedia) and demonstrated that I was a high value male and this led to me getting her number and meeting her for a coffee. (More on High Value Male later....very important but I'm too tired to go into it right now)
So, we went for a coffee and we chatted about HER. Tip One: Always talk about her
You don't give information away freely about yourself until she asks you because you are a high value male. You don't need to impress any woman, she needs to impress you. This really is a state of mind, but an easy way to start being high value is keeping everything about her until she makes the effort to ask about you. Imagine what its like being her, if shes telling a story imagine how she is feeling and wherever possible make her laugh.
We went on from our coffee into a bar and she bought us drinks. Again, she needs to pull her weight with me. She kept on jabbing me when I poked fun at her and by the end of the date I was hand in hand with her, walking her to her stripclub and she gave me a kiss before she went. Not bad for the first day in my social experiment, we arranged to meet up in the future. I then went back home and checked my online dating profiles and found I had a message....ooooo.....interesting. The message was from a girl called Steph. I emailed her back and she replied pretty much straight away. She was bloschy and very direct with her questions so i could tell that she thought alot of herself. I responded by being just as direct to her questions. Her questions were like: Where would you most like to go in the world? What do you do for a living? Where do you go out? She was eager, so I suggested that we meet up now so we can discuss these questions. After a ten minute MSN conversation - she suggested that we MSNed - I was heading out to meet her - very random. I joked with her and told her to wear a tight top and short skirt so Id know who she was - and she did. Only a high value male would act like this. Its screaming that she needs to justify herself to me and not the other way around. So we met in a pub....this leads me on to a very very very important next tip. Tip Two: Lead Whether its which venue you are going to, what time you meet, where you are going to sit - you LEAD. You don't ask for her permission or approval you just lead and do it. Women love this because it shows your sure of yourself and confident. I love this because its so simple and doesn't take any effort at all. I answered all of her quick fire questions calmly, slowly and confidently. This is important because whenever a girl is asking you questions like this she is challenging you. She is testing to see if you are good enough and can handle her. if you let nothing phase you and answer calmly and confidently and even better...slowly...you scream confidence without appearing arrogant or cocky. You will always pass the test. I find that men worry about what they say - care less about the content and focus on how you put it across because it will work wonders. After a really nice night and good conversation, she drove us back to hers and we bedroom hockeyed. (I am going to find adventurous ways to describe sex in this blog I think) I liked Steph, she was confident, pretty and a 34C. She also showed me messages from other men she had received from her dating website and it inspired me to really continue with this blog, because some of these men had absolutely no clue on how to handle or interact with women. one guy had put "I think I can fulfil the vacancy" - its not a job interview, its a date. that is one of the worst messages i have ever read. I encouraged her to go out on more dates but not expect too much because she had already had the best one!! Cheeky, confident humour - always goes down well. So, my first day of my social experiment. Two dates and some bedroom Violin playing. Not bad at all. The one thing I learnt today is that its important to be yourself and be completely at ease in your environment. Whether thats a coffee shop, bar or someone elses bedroom. If you act completely comfortable in your surroundings you are at your most attractive.....more tomorrow guys.
23rd October 2009
OK Cyberworld - here goes everything!! My first ever post on my first ever blog! And when I woke up I didn't think my day was going to be exciting. I thought I would share my thoughts and ideas with the internet whilst I conduct my first ever major social experiment into attracting women in the hope that I can help people and they can help me. Last year my friend turned up on the doorstep of my flat with a book that he told me I "had to read" - he said that every man should read it and thus started my fascination with attraction and the dynamics of how to attract any woman on planet earth. The book was called "The Game" by the way. This sparked off my interest in this subject and since reading that book I have read many others and viewed alot of material on how to attract women. For a while now I have been using concepts found in all these different types of books with varied results. Alot of the information is very contradictory depending on which writer you are reading and what they want to sell you so it doesn't always work....this has led me to my social experiment...
What I write here is MY thoughts / opinions / experiences and I will share what I thought went well and my thoughts on what you can do to attract any woman you want on planet earth. The social experiment is to approach at least one woman a day for a year and try and get her phone number, take her out on a date and lead to bedroom gymnastic kind of antics (although that isn't the complete aim!) the complete aim is to stimulate attraction in as much women as possible because I think I have developed a system which works every single time, whatever social situation you are in - so follow me people on my journey - comment, ask questions give opinions and I promise that I will do my best in exchanging information on what worked and what didn't work in every interaction I have. By the end of it I will have shared every element of the system with you. I am determined!!
So a bit more about me, you ask? Im 26 and I live in the UK. Physically I am not very attractive to women. My mum says I'm no Brad Pitt but I'm no hunchback of Notre Dame either, so I'm somewhere in the middle, this puts me in the category of millions of men on our planet. To really paint a picture I calculated my Body Mass Index and I'm firmly in the overweight range. Luckily I'm tall but naked I am no six pack - well six pack of beer maybe! Haha. The first thing you have to accept is that women do NOT judge you on your looks - as men we think women think the same as us here because we have our "man-scale" - our boobs,bum,legs and face scale that we judge women on - which is shallow. Women are much deeper, so your looks won't hinder you when attracting women. Theres your first bit of advice, it is just something that you need to accept and believe because you will instantly more attractive when interacting with women just because you think this.
So, my first step in attracting women? Posting up a profile on all the free online dating sites that I can, as sad as this process is I figure that it will lead to social situations with women where I can test out my system and see if it works. I am going out into town tonight, as its a Friday and I have a few dates already set-up through various encounters for the weekend so I can throw myself into my social experiment and share with you everything so bookmark me and enjoy reading and commenting! I'll type tomorrow
What I write here is MY thoughts / opinions / experiences and I will share what I thought went well and my thoughts on what you can do to attract any woman you want on planet earth. The social experiment is to approach at least one woman a day for a year and try and get her phone number, take her out on a date and lead to bedroom gymnastic kind of antics (although that isn't the complete aim!) the complete aim is to stimulate attraction in as much women as possible because I think I have developed a system which works every single time, whatever social situation you are in - so follow me people on my journey - comment, ask questions give opinions and I promise that I will do my best in exchanging information on what worked and what didn't work in every interaction I have. By the end of it I will have shared every element of the system with you. I am determined!!
So a bit more about me, you ask? Im 26 and I live in the UK. Physically I am not very attractive to women. My mum says I'm no Brad Pitt but I'm no hunchback of Notre Dame either, so I'm somewhere in the middle, this puts me in the category of millions of men on our planet. To really paint a picture I calculated my Body Mass Index and I'm firmly in the overweight range. Luckily I'm tall but naked I am no six pack - well six pack of beer maybe! Haha. The first thing you have to accept is that women do NOT judge you on your looks - as men we think women think the same as us here because we have our "man-scale" - our boobs,bum,legs and face scale that we judge women on - which is shallow. Women are much deeper, so your looks won't hinder you when attracting women. Theres your first bit of advice, it is just something that you need to accept and believe because you will instantly more attractive when interacting with women just because you think this.
So, my first step in attracting women? Posting up a profile on all the free online dating sites that I can, as sad as this process is I figure that it will lead to social situations with women where I can test out my system and see if it works. I am going out into town tonight, as its a Friday and I have a few dates already set-up through various encounters for the weekend so I can throw myself into my social experiment and share with you everything so bookmark me and enjoy reading and commenting! I'll type tomorrow
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